Wow, our little man slept for around 6 hours last night. Jan awoke at 430 and thought that she had totally missed something!! Tristan is sure throwin' us curve-balls every day/night. We had our 2 month pediatrician appointment today. Dr. Kamon was happy about his progress. about 50th percentile for height and weight. She also stuck him with a couple vaccines today and he really took it like a man. We were both really surprised at his reaction...Obvious initial wailing, but after about a minute he was totally fine.9 weeks. Thats how long we have kept a totally dependent human alive; its pretty amazing.
I was telling Jan tonight about my epiphany. I can be a pretty selfish and absorbed person. On Saturday I was literally feeling like my insides were tying themselves up in knots; I felt I really needed some "seth" time. I was super anxious and had a lot of nervous energy. Tristan was cyring in his swing and I could feel my blood pressure rising. I pulled him out of the swing and layed him on the couch and started singing to him. "You are my sunshine, my only sunshine. You make me happy when skies are grey..." And then I finally realized it. It was like a huge wave came over me and all my anxiety and bad energy just dissipated. It was amazing. I was really disappointed in myself for not instantly becoming immune to his crying from the start. It was a hard transition. I kept thinking, "you are terrible, his cries frustrate you...that isn't normal for a parent." I always was thinking "What am i doing wrong, why is he crying". As a male, we are constantly trying to solve situations and if we cant...FAILURE. But with this little guy, there isnt always an answer or it might not be obvious. So one thing I learned is not to be so hard on myself. I may not be able to get him to stop cyring, and that is OKAY. Maybe a hand-off to mom is in order, or maybe he has an upset tummy. But realizing that was a huge step in the learning process. And he is just so damn cute!
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